Last Thursday I received a call from a “Restricted” number on my cell phone, I usually don’t answer those calls because most of the time they are from banks granting you an unsolicited loan, or from someone wanting to sell you something, but, since I was in the evening traffic jam I wanted to have some fun with the little guy or girl so I took the call. To my surprise the caller was an old “friend” that wanted to know how I was, well, he wanted something more, but I will explain later, first I will explain who he is.

This guy was my childhood neighbor, we grew up together, broke a lot of things together and fought a lot of times. Later on when we got a little older, in the teenage years, we started “playing” together with our sexuality. It was nothing sentimental, just physical, he wanted my dick, I wanted his, nothing more. That “relationship” lasted for a few years, I think around three, but it was not a persistent one because we were living with our parents, so, we only got together like three times per year or something like that. I put an end to that when one day I was sick with the flu, feeling like shit and laying in my bed with a blanket up to my neck when suddenly he storms in my room without invitation from my part and starts touching me saying, “hey, there is no one home, let’s do something”. I got so fucking angry that started cursing and yelling at him, my brothers were close to the house and they heard me so they came in, and without knowing what was happening beated the crap out of him and kicked him out of the house. That was priceless. Days after that someone started to call to my house but when I picked the phone the only thing you could hear was someone breathing on the other side, that went on a few months until we moved.

A few months after that we moved from that house because my father wanted to be close to his mother (fucking mama’s boy) so we rented the old house and I forgot about him. Two of the last things I heard from him was that he molested someone’s child, but the case fell on the court, and that he got married…, with a woman…(AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!).

Back to the call…
Well, at first he started telling me a problem that he has with a computer, knowing that I am an ubber expert in computers that is to be expected *cough*, then about my work and stuff, and then back to the computer, he wanted to know when I was going back to Utuado so I could work on his computer at what I said that my next visit would be around thanksgiving and that I wouldn’t be doing any computer fixing that day, then I arrived home and told him something cryptic to end the call. That was around 5:30pm and by 7:15 I had 25 missed “Restricted” calls. I decided to ignore the calls because I knew what he wanted and it had nothing to do with computers.

On Friday I receive another “Restricted” call at 5:01PM and the conversation went on somewhat like this.

Me: Hey, what do you want…
He: Hey!!!, yesterday I called you back but you didn’t answer!, damn, you are so difficult to find!.
Me: I was busy.
He: Ah, I see, so, hey!, some co-workers are going to a pub tonight but I don’t know how to get there, is near the Rosevelt Avenue, close to the Telephone Company, do you know a pub there?
Me: Umm, no, I don’t go out much…
He: Ahahaha, yeah, you love to be at your house, forgot about that, always playing video games, damn, you never grow up!, ahahahaha!!!
Me: Ummmm, why should I?
He: That’s ok, hey, listen!, when could we go out and have some drinks?
Me: I have plans today…
He: It doesn’t have to be today!, It can be any day of the week!
Me: I don’t think so, I get off work at 5 with no desire to socialize…
He: Ahhh, I see, I heard you live in the first floor of your brother’s house, is that right?
Me: Erm…, Yes I am…., who told you that?
He: Your mother.
Me: Sometimes she speaks too much…
He: AHAHAHAHA, you are so funny!
Me: …
He: So, you can practically take anyone there to have sex right?
Me: Umm…., erm…, yes I can, it’s my house.
He: So when are you taking me?
Me: For what?
He: Come-on, you know what I want!
Me: Yes I know, I was just waiting for you to ask..
He: Really?, so, when could I go?
Me: Never.
He: Aww, come-on, why?
Me: For start, I am in a relationship…
He: Pft!, so do I!, that has nothing to do!
Me: Unlike you I am faithful to the end…
He: Dude come-on!, he doesn’t have to know!, that doesn’t matter, one can love someone while having sex with another one!
Me: It matters to me, and I already told you I am not like that, sex between us won’t happen again, ever.
He: It matters to you?…., I see…, anyway, my friends are calling me on the other line, bye!

And that was the end. I SERIOUSLY hope that he never calls me again. And if he do I wont be as calm and easy going as last time, I will tell him to get the fuck out of the closet and to stop lying to his wife, anyway, she will know sooner or later.

The moral of this story?, DAMN I AM HOT!

Posted in English Writings, Meaningless Shit |